Menstruation is an Externalization of Fragility

My body weighs thousand pounds

rolling in bed

slightly burnt

For me all emotions come with sadness

happiness too 

coffee tastes safe for me as the bitterness

makes the sweetness settle

not floating,  nor intimidating

I also want to be happy ,

to drink hot chocolate

not worrying about gaining weight

believing I'm being loved is a million times harder than believing I'm disliked

not as inferiority

just not believing in good luck

Music is great, bleeding is great,

menstruation is an externalization of fragility

woman's body is always changing

sadness, joy, food, love, chocolate,

Everything being so subtly united.

Resting my head on a pillow

picturing spring in my mind

running 

rolling down the hill

dancing with a bear and buried myself in her belly

There's always an urgency to keep creating

as if my very existence isn't enough

We feel trapped as we think we should act

But sometimes action comes with more brokenness

and in some still

and fluid moments

I feel whole.

2022. 05. 27